Arizona Adventures

So here are a few of our adventures over the last month or so!!! I cannot begin to explain how great it has been living in Surprise. We were welcomed with open arms by friends from the past as well as new ones! People here are really very kind, more kind and open than any other place I have lived. Kind of what I expected by living in the midwest, but was NOT the case! I have met some amazing people who have opened their homes and hearts to us. It just feels right here. Here are the adventures that we have enjoyed (some of them at least)! Between visits to the Surprise Park, (naptime in the chair with mommy),Spring Training Games, playing with Rebecca (see the fabulous bouquets the girls made for their weddings), bike rides, Dirt Pie, and lunch downtown with Daddy and his fellow officers-we stay busy!

Good News for the Little Warrior

We have great news to share with everyone. We took Wyatt to Phoenix Children's Hospital on Friday for his follow up x-ray. I got to peek at the x-ray before they printed a CD for us to send back to Denver Children's Hospital to be measured. It looks AMAZING!!! I could not detect a curve whatsoever. His last x-ray in November was measured at 10 degrees (there is a 5 degree margin of error), I could detect a slight curve in that x-ray. This one looks as good if not better! We are so grateful and feel so blessed. Prayers have done wonderful things for our family and for Wyatt. I cannot say enough about the wonderful people who I have had the pleasure of getting to know through CAST, the support group for parents of children with Infantile Scoliosis. I received the gift of having someone pick up her phone on one of my darkest days as a mother and reassure me, and give me hope and guidance. You know who you are! With her guidance and reassurance we were set on a path that was agressive and educated, and Wyatt has surely benefitted from her wisdom and experience. I am so lucky to have come across these wonderful mothers!

This is my take on Wyatt's scoliosis. Wyatt was breech and in an odd position for much of the third trimester of my pregnancy. I am convinced that this caused his curve. He grew in that position, and once he was born did not have the strength or the muscle elasticity to grow straight. Once we started agressive physical therapy Wyatt's muscles could release so that his spine could start to grow straight again. Perhaps Wyatt had the Scoliosis that goes away on its own for unknown reasons, but I think mostly it was intrauterine positioning. Wyatt's muscle tone was so low as a young infant that the physical therapy was essential to his development and straightening out! It was hard work, mostly for him, hard for me to watch when he cried. It was odd I am sure, to have his entire proprioception altered and broadened. He didn't know his body could move that way! Without this early and agressive intervention I am positive Wyatt would have grown into his curve further. He would probably have been casted at least once. While his was not as severe as those babies who have more congenital or progressive Scoliosis, his would have been progressive simply because his muscles didn't know better. I am forever grateful to the wonderful doctors, specialists and especially the physical therapists at NCMC in Greeley. They are the best! I am happy to report Wyatt has taken his first solo steps! Not bad for a baby that wasn't able to hold his chest up until 6 months! He has come so far. His name means Little Warrior, and there isn't much else I could say to sum up his first year of life. This little warrior has battled and won, with the prayers and amazing guidance of our friends and family. Thank you to all of you who lifted us up in those early days, they were frightening and challenging and I couldn't have gotten through them without you. Thank you to those of you who have asked about his progress, it means the world to me to know those of you who really care about my children. Thank you to the moms of CAST who have given me reassurance that even the best doctors, friends and family could not. I hope I can answer the call someday from a scared mother who needs help, guidance, and mostly to know she isn't alone. Wyatt's journey has been one that has taught me more than I could ever begin to explain, and I am so grateful that he is growing straight. I will post the actual results of his RVAD and COBB angles once Dr. Erikson in Denver looks at the x-ray. I am hoping he won't have to have another x-ray for at least 6 months!!! XOXO

Wabi Sabi Mom

I just read an article on Wabi Sabi. It is a Japanese term used to describe beauty in imperfection. The article really resonated with me...for a lot of reasons. It talked about slowing down and appreciating who you are, and really loving that moment in your life. Our culture is youth obsessed, and I admit that I sometimes find myself playing that game. Even though I just turned 30, it was definitely one of those birthdays that caused me to pause and reflect. Over the past year so much has happened in our life as a family, and for me as a mother, daughter and friend that I have finally had time to really sit down and think about it all. When I look back on the past five years, well, my head starts to spin. I think Wabi Sabi is the perfect way to sum up the conclusions that I have drawn during these reflections.

First comes vanity. I have noticed little wrinkles around my eyes, and now I have to come to terms with what I used to always say to other women when they talked about wrinkles "they mean that you laugh a lot, smile a lot, love a lot and have lived!" "Be grateful"! Ahhh, easier said than done when you are staring those lines in the mirror, my sweet and younger self. I no longer can get away with wearing the clothes I used to, partly because I have had two babies and because I am 30! There are certain trends that are better left to the 20 somethings (lower 20 somethings). These are all things that have shown themselves within the last couple of years, but turning 30 forced me to really recognize them. I guess it happens to everyone, and I should take my own stinking advice and just be grateful I made it to 30, right? I love the 30 year old Erin though! The 20 something Erin never left the house without makeup, FULL makeup, hair done (unless I was wearing a ballcap). 20 something Erin complained about her body. I have come into this whole beauty in imperfection thing quite well I think! 30 year old Erin hardly wears any makeup now, not because I made some choice to do so, but I am finally comfortable in letting the world see me. I don't know what I was hiding under all that goop on my face, but I was hiding nonetheless. Gone is the fear in what someone might think, it isn't that I don't care, but I really like what I see on my face (most days). 30 year old Erin is chunkier than the younger one, but getting healthier! Turning 30 forced me to change some lifestyle choices and realize I wanted to set a good example for my kids. As a result, I have lost around 10 lbs (depends on the day) and am going to be training with a friend for a 1/2 marathon next fall. Something I swore I would never do, I mean, who runs if they have a choice not to? I don't entertain some fantasy that I will ever look the way I did back in those pre-Wabi Sabi days. That belongs to the woman that hadn't felt her very own flesh and blood growing and twirling inside of her, or stayed up all night with a sick and crying baby, face hot and sweaty with a fever. No, I definitely don't have any desire to be her. I just want to be a more fit and healthy, perhaps sassier version of this 30 year old mom.

The Wabi Sabi in my life is looking at those wrinkles, and while cringing just a bit, knowing that they reflect the beautiful and not so beautiful experiences that I am fortunate enough to remember.

Finding beauty in imperfection isn't always an easy task. It is hard when things aren't going the way you want them to, but there is always beauty in that moment. I have struggled with loss of friendships, huge personal changes, but I have come to a place finally, where I can appreciate them for what those changes meant for my life and my own growth. I have learned that I try to hang on way too long. I hang on to stuff, clothes, people, ideas, goals, clinging to them, praying, hoping they will change, or I will be able to incorporate them into my life again. From my size 26 jeans to momentos from my childhood, I have learned the art of letting go, I think. I still struggle with it, but I am getting better. This is a huge part of Wabi Sabi for me, because I think I have tried too long to make everything perfect for myself and the people around me. I realize now that the imperfect is beautiful, in my personal relationships and in myself. Somethings just don't work out, and that is okay! I will keep coming back to this one, I think I have a lot to learn regarding Wabi Sabi and it will be a continuous lesson for me. I have been a Ms. Fix It for my entire life, wanting everyone to be happy and make things right for people. I almost am breathing a sigh of relief as I have let that girl go! She was too uptight and so scared that something was going to go wrong. People are dissapointing, relationships can be dissapointing, and things just like relationships aren't meant to last forever sometimes. It is hard for a Ms. Fix It to admit when she just can't fix something, but I think she finally has. What I would have once found to be an imperfection in myself and others, well, now I recognize it isn't some much an imperfection, but more "just the way it is"...and that can be beautiful if I step away far enough and just breathe.

Moses and his "magical kwand", the President and Angels

I am trying to play catch up, Taylor has been coming up with stuff that only a 3 year old can. I have meant to keep a journal for both kids, but just maintaining sanity around here is a struggle. So the last journal entry was when Taylor was around 18 months old. Her latest most endearing story (there will be many more as I recall the more funny and sweet ones) is about Moses.

Her preschool is fantastic, and she is learning so many great things. It is Christian based education, which we are thrilled about. I love hearing her tell me the stories from the Bible, and her prayers at night are so sweet. The latest story she told me about was Moses. It went something like this. Moses had a magical "kwand" and he was trying to help people get out of the water. So they got across and to the mountain. When I asked her how his wand was magical she told me it was just a stick actually, but that God made it magic. Then she proceeded to tell me that the President and God are the same people (yes, I cringed, but I smiled). She went on to say that God made all of us, all of the animals and he keeps us safe. He is way up in the stars, oh "and Mars is way up there, but it is too far away". Oh to be three again! The things she comes up with on a daily basis make me cringe, and smile. Her heart is so pure! You might see her wearing an angel necklace from time to time. This goes along with a book that we are reading about a little girl who has a new baby in the house and some behavior issues. An angel visits her at night and asks her to be nice and listen to mommy, then gives her an angel necklace to help remind her to be sweet and kind during the day. So Taylor wears her necklace from time to time! Many more great Taylor stories to come...I promise. When Wyatt starts talking I am sure he will have many equally profound things to add! Right now he blows bubbles, makes massive messes, and bangs everything in site with his new hammer. He is on the verge of walking finally, and will have follow up x-rays with hopefully very positive results! Good night all!

Krautburgers

Taylor and her Uma made some awesome Krautburgers. This pictures is pretty old, but I love it. Taylor is actually quite the cook. She is great at cracking eggs, and loves to bake. She is always reading me the directions and ingredients, she can tell the temperature and how many eggs it takes, for example. I can't wait to turn the kitchen over to her someday...and I will sit back with a glass of wine and let her wait on me!

Dinner at our House

New blog...

Here I go again. I couldn't bring myself to continue on a blog site that had anything to do with North Dakota, so I changed it! I will be adding pics and videos, as well as documenting the mundane and crazy as we go along. Hopefully during naptime! They don't come very frequently or very long around here. Please leave us messages and please please please come visit us anytime!!!!